Random Stories

Under the Stars

Hysham, Montana



I love the outdoors and simple homemade cooking, so you can be certain that I have a knack for picnics. The same goes for my current girlfriend. We both enjoy getting up early in the morning to make a few sandwiches, pack a cooler or maybe a grill and some meats and just go to a nice spot. We did this as Sunday tradition, we wouldn’t miss it for anything even if it was rainy, but how could we have picnics under the rain? Well, it may sound corny as all hell, but we sat in our living room and stared out the window.

We also did small picnics at night when the weather was good and we had nothing to do the next morning. Such was the case a few weeks ago, when we headed for the country in my pick-up truck to find a nice spot to set down our blanket and basket. Yeah, my girlfriend got so excited over our little hobby that she would sometimes carry this big old basket with her on our Sunday trips. It was a basket that she got from her grandmother one day. You’ll see why this old basket is so important in a moment.

The spot we parked on was beautiful, it was right under a big tree and had plenty of shade. What we wanted was to picnic through the night so we spent the day reading a book together, swimming at a little pond and then firing up our small grill at dawn. The night came along with a few clouds, but there was enough light for us to see each other’s faces without having to use our flash lights.

We cuddled under a thick blanket and popped open a bottle of wine, super market wine to be specific, so nothing fancy. We drank from our glasses and tried spotting starts through the tree’s branches until we decided to do something a bit more “appropriate for adults.”

I looked around to try and spot any would be onlookers, but the coast seemed clear so we started undoing our clothes. The second things started to get going, I heard a rustling sound nearby so I shone my flash light in its direction.

A raccoon was looking through the basket for food. I scared him off and went to check the damage. The basket seemed fine, my girlfriend let out a big sigh of relief, after I told her. I always thought it was just a basket until she mentioned her plans for it, “We can use it to go out with our baby!” My reaction came along the lines of “what baby?” She rubbed her belly and gave me the news.

She’s now starting to show a little, and I’ll never forget the first morning I spent as a future father. What started off as a small romantic picnic became one of the most meaningful moments of our lives. Plus, the raccoon was nice enough to leave the cooler with our breakfast untouched, so we didn’t have to go hungry while we drove back home.

Bone Night

Lake City, South Dakota



This is a memory from a few years ago, but one that I won’t certainly forget, it’s not a good story, though, that’s for sure. It was the night that almost every girl in high school looks forward to, I was no exception to the rule despite my attitude towards most parties. This was due to the fact that my best friend and I had finally become a couple a few weeks before prom, so we would be going together rather than sit at home to watch TV or play video games.

What made the night more special was that we had a promise, we were both virgins at the time and agreed that we could give it a try after prom at my place. Needless to say I was nervous, not only because of the “first time” deal but because I was wearing a dress to prom and it would be the first time my boyfriend had ever seen me in one.

He went for the cheesiest looking suit and hair-do, even going as far as to buy some flowers. My mom thought he was charming, but she didn’t hear him talking about how we would have the best time ever. He was sweating bullets and talking non-sense for most of the drive there, but he kept his cool in front of his buddies. We were a tight circle of friends so it was fine for me to see him ask for advice from his close guy friends, I tried to do the same with my sister so I saw where he was coming from.

The prom itself was fairly boring to say the least, we danced only one slow piece and that was on account of a simple fact. My boyfriend spent most of the dance awkwardly poking me with his boner, it wouldn’t go away so he didn’t let go for any reason. “I don’t want anyone to see it, please!” that’s what he kept saying as he poked my leg and thigh, you see, he was smart enough not to wear any underwear “In order to save time when it counts baby” so he was free balling it across the dance floor.

I spent most of my prom night standing in front of him until he could calm down, which was a momentary respite at best, since any cleavage or even looking at me would get him going. It was funny at first, but having him go like a dimming light for two hours really killed any mood I’ve might have been in for the night.
A part of me saw it as a light hearted moment to take away from the stress, but for the most part it was simply awful. We finally got into his car and headed to my place, we cuddled and kissed a bit like we normally did, but we knew this was special. Tonight was going to be different and the both of us would change as friends, as a couple and as young adults.
Or at least we would have if he could get it up, the second I felt ready and prepared myself to be more than a girl he simply wasn’t up for the task. We tried different things but the whole situation was so awkward that we left it at that.

We decided to sleep together in the nude to at least do something romantic, at least until my dad showed up in the morning due to my sister blurting out that we would be sneaking into my room. She’s not much of a talker, specially over breakfast but you want to know what the worst part was? My boyfriend had a case of morning wood.

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